Oh, wasabi…let me count the ways I love you.

In the spring when my sinuses are blocked from allergies you quickly clear them like no nasal spray can. And for that I am deeply and forever grateful.

You give us a big laugh when we switch the green tea ice cream for a big glump of you when our friend isn’t looking.

You grow along the beds of pure and gentle mountain brooks in Japan. The thought of which is so beautiful it makes me want to write haiku about you.

I quickly forgive you of the pain caused when I ingest too much. And stifle my screams when it feels as if my nose will melt off my face. Instead I hold my nose and exclaim, “Ooo, it hurts so good!”

But, my dear readers, I must break an ugly secret to you. Most of the wasabi we eat is faux wasabi. Yes, faux! <Gasp!> It’s a combination of plain old horseradish, mustard, corn starch, food coloring and an ever so tiny amount of the real stuff. But I don’t blame sushi restaurants for whipping up a cheaper version as the real deal costs about $60 or more a pound.

How can you tell if you’re eating the real stuff? Well, if you’re plucking your sushi off of a conveyor belt or a boat, I think it’s safe to say it’s faux. Some, albeit few, of the better high-end restaurants will invest in the good stuff, as your bill will reflect. But, like a fine wine, the taste is cleaner and smoother and packs a much more powerful punch. The texture is also grainier, much like fresh grated horseradish, not smooth.

So the next time you’re at an expensive sushi restaurant sit at the counter (the best seat in the house) and ask the chef, “Hon-wasabi desu ka?” (Is the wasabi real?)

Itadakimasu! (Let’s eat!)

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It’s going to be a quick one today, folks, because I am furiously packing up the house for our move to Seattle! Before I could drag myself out of bed this morning to commence the dreaded job of packing, I grabbed my laptop for a little morning food news.

I came across an article about Spam sushi (called Spam Musubi) on Serious Eats. Spam sushi!? Remember my blog about me being a sushi snob? Well, here’s one of those moments where I turn up my nose. I guess I should try (almost) everything once, but this would be a stretch…

Although I love the author’s article and her picture is beautiful.

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I shamelessly admit that I’m a sushi snob. It’s unavoidable. I lived in Japan for three years and ate some of the best and highest quality fish. The bar was set high. I have found many exceptional sushi establishments in the US, but unfortunately, I have also encountered a great number of sub-standard ones. Raw fish is just not something you want to mess with if you’re not going to do it right.

An interesting article, Japan to certify cuisine but no ’sushi police, explains how a group of experts in Japan, with support of the Ministry of Agriculture, has launched a campaign to certify authentic Japanese cuisine overseas. According to the article, “Promoters unveiled a logo that will identify “real” Japanese restaurants overseas — a pair of chopsticks holding a cherry petal set in front of a red rising-sun flag.” Personally, I think it would be nice if all cultural food had some sort of authentic stamp of approval, but I would greatly appreciate seeing this logo in Japanese restaurant windows. I’m still reeling from the too thick semi- frozen piece of tuna I had a few months ago.

For more about this subject, as well as some great articles on sushi in general, check out Sushi Otaku.

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When there’s crab in the house there are no left-overs. Really, I can eat my body weight in these critters. But we actually had a bunch of meat remaining and I was at a loss for what to make. I didn’t want crab cakes or bisque; I was in the mood for something along the lines of sushi, but frankly, was just too tired for anything that involved. So I thought, “What’s tasty and requires the least amount of effort? Chirashi!” And, healthy too. Chirashi sushi literally means scattered sushi. There’s no fixed recipe for chirashi, and your fish can be cooked or raw.

Ours was simply this: rice, crab meat, avocado, julienned cucumber, umeboshi (pickled plums), cooked carrot (I used my little crab cookie cutter to show that I wasn’t completely slacking off in the preparation) and black sesame. YUM! I served it with a little wasabi and soy sauce and, of course, hot sake.

Kampai!

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